Friday, December 4, 2009

What God's been teaching/showing me


11/20/09 Taken from my journal:
I know now one of the reasons we have not been given a fifth child. My will needed to be broken. I wanted that child so much that I really didn't care what God wanted for me. God had to break my will and make my will His will. I needed to be shown this. I now want and desire what God wants. Whatever that may be. I was finding my identity in having children. And having them whenever I wanted to. Ben wondered if he was the one who needed to be broken. It has taken almost a year for me to get to the place where Your will is better than my will. But more that that, my will has become Your will. I was holding onto my will so tightly. Thank you for Your mercy in revealing this to me.

3 comments:

arabelle marie said...

Amazingly enough, this is what God has been talking to me about. Not in the context of children, but in the context of what's going on in our lives. It's really not about Guam or plans or anything, it's about being willing to bring God glory in whatever that may be.

I love your heart.

Our growing family said...

beautiful.
thanks for sharing your personal journal too.
hope you are well!

Heather said...

Thank you for sharing Kami! It is awesome that you can see a portion of God's plan for the past year and that you are in line with Him.