Thursday, December 27, 2007

We were not meant for time





These pictures were taken the weekend of Memory's birth, 14 almost 15 months ago. The kids are growing up so quickly I feel like sometimes I'm missing it even when its right under my nose. (maybe that's why I'm missing it:) I love looking at pictures of the past, but it usually fills me with a sense of sadness and longing. Its hard to put my finger on why except to realize we were not meant for time. I look forward to the day when we will get to dwell with God without the cage of time. Wow, how crazy wonderful will that be?

This pretty much sums it up:
"And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.'" Revelation 21:3-4

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Friday, December 14, 2007

okay...so let's be real here

The reality of having a rash on my face is it made me realize how insecure I am. And how I have put my security in 'looking' a certain way for people instead of the amazing security I know I already have in Jesus. This world has a particular form of what 'beauty' is and it has nothing to do with what God says is beautiful. The only thing that matters to God and ultimately in the end is a heart and life given FULLY to God to transform into His likeness. That's it. Every day I'm faced with the lie that my worth is in what lies around me. This includes how I look. If only I could fast-forward oh let's say 40 years and see that what's in the mirror is not gonna last just like everything else around me. If I could see that every day that might wake me up enough to see through all the bull-shitt this world offers. But instead I'll have to try to remember this as I daily struggle through what it means to have my sole worth in Jesus. Nothing more, nothing less. How's that for some honesty, eh?

Oh, and the dermatologist said I have Rosacea. The best way he described it is adult-onset acne but kinda different than what you would think of when you think of acne if that makes sense. Anyways, he told me to go get some antibiotics (oh joy!) and hopefully that will clear it up. Apparently it can get a lot worse than what I have so it's probably good I'm dealing with it now.

here it is...




Please read previous post to understand what I'm talking about
And when I get hot then it really flares up all red and stuff. Not fun!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

nothing like a rash on a face

I've been quite blessed my whole life in not having to worry too much about my complexion. However in the last 3 months that kinda changed for me. I developed a rash on my face that progressively got worse. I have NO idea how it got there either. So I finally buckled down and decided I needed to see a dermatologist. I hardly go to the doctor ever so this is definitely a new thing for me. We don't have insurance right now either so I had to figure out how much this whole thing would cost which is impossible to figure out exactly. Anyways, I'm really glad to go in tomorrow cause its the first and hopefully last step I need to take to get this itchy flaming rash off my face.

ps and I would post a pic but that has been hard to do as of late

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

I'm posting anyways

Is it just me being retarded or is this blogger thing hard to get the hang of? I really wanted to post pictures but every time I try something seems to go wrong. I figured I don't need to have a picture with every post. People mostly just want to hear what's going on in my life, right? Alright then.

My days have been preoccupied right now with figuring out how to homeschool Dove. That's right you heard it HOMESCHOOL. Now I know what a lot of you might be thinking because I thought the same thing at one time. But over the course of the last couple of months God has really been moving us in that direction and we're really excited to take hold of it. It all started while we were over in Kentucky for the last several months spending time with friends and family. A lot of families that we were in community with over there homeschool their kids (my brother included). Ben got to talk to one guy about the reason his family homeschools and it really impacted Ben. He said the main reason they homeschool his kids is because he wants his kids identity (aside from God) to be their family and not a group of kids at school. What naturally happens is that by the shear amount of time you spend at school with your peers they naturally become your identity. Now don't get me wrong we have nothing against public schools, in fact we were all ready to send Dove back when we really felt the Lord calling us in another direction. I also understand that homeschool is definitely not for everyone and rightly so. However, we feel that it fits perfectly with our family vision and the direction we are heading. The other aspect of how it fits better into our lives is the incredible flexibility of it all. We are basically able to make our own schedule of how our life looks from week to week. Instead of having to work around the 6-7 hr. 5 days a week regular school schedule. This allows us to do so much with the kids. From being able to take them climbing to taking them on dates with their Dad/Mom or just having more family time at home. So this past week I was trying to figure out how in the world was I going to homeschool. Honestly I was very daunted about the whole idea of having to teach her everything myself. And then I found The Family Learning Center in Redmond (next year it will be in Kirkland) This was exactly what I needed. They partner with you in helping you develop a learning plan for you and your child. They offer every kind of class you need there. So you are able to pick and choose which classes you want your child in and which subjects you will work with them at home. So it enabled me to still do homeschooling but not all alone. Plus this center is funded through the school district which is also a huge plus. So I really saw God's hand in all of this. He really fitted the pieces together just right.