Thursday, February 23, 2012

finding intimacy






When I was talking with the Lord this morning I realized a correlation between spending quality/intimate time with God and spending quality/intimate time with Ben (my husband). I avoid both. And I was asking the question: WHY? Simple answer: because it's hard. Too hard sometimes to be vulnerable with someone. Why do I make time for Yahoo news everyday, but fail to make time for God or my husband? Because Yahoo news doesn't demand my heart. It doesn't ask me to be completely vulnerable and honest with it. It's not a relationship. But I'm tired of running. I'm ready to engage. But my heart is not ready. Father, change and heal my heart so that I can fully engage with You and my husband. I'm tired of making more time for surfing the Web than for You. But I need You to change me from the inside out. I need You to make my heart more like Yours and less like Adam & Eve's when they decided not to trust you and became ashamed and hid from You. I'm tired of hiding. It's time to come out from behind the bushes and meet our Maker, our Lover, our Friend.

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